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Building a raft : ProgrammerHumor

Building a raft : ProgrammerHumor

Building a raft with…

SPECS: raft can fit two people, has a sail, is made of wood. Nobody thought about specifying that it should float.

FUNDING: the investors decided a raft wasn’t a viable investment. You instead start implementing machine learning on a new Facebook but for dogs, still stuck on your island.

QA: your raft is ready, it floats, it sails. QA is still blocking you, as they report that if you spin clockwise three times while standing on the raft before it is hit by a meteorite it might sink

MARKET RESEARCH: There is more demand for a Facebook for dogs, and apparently another island is already working on it. They even use machine learning. The raft project is pushed back to next year.

DEADLINE: The raft is released at the last moment, and actually looks like a raft. It has only a small issue that might cause it to sink, but only if it’s on water. The user probably won’t notice, it’s fine.

DEMAND: Your raft is functional and open-source and saves hundreds of people who were stuck on their islands. You feel pride for exactly one day, before waking to a mailbox full of insults, death threats, complaints about the raft not being usable as a Facebook for dogs, and requests that you implement the ability to float on lava RIGHT NOW.