facebook_pixel

Gotta catch em all : funny

Gotta catch em all : funny

You set your destination before you leave. Or you pull over. It’s not difficult, It’s inconvenient, but so is plowing your Acura into a minivan and killing an entire family except for the kid who has cancer who was on their way to Disneyland as part of the Make-a-wish foundation and now has to die in foster care because you wanted to catch a Kadabra.

Folks always think this sort of thing will never happen to them. “I’m a good driver” they tell themselves, as they drive through a school zone looking for a Jigglypuff, but not at the road. Who might get injured or die today? Let’s throw the dice so I can catch a singing balloon. Oh woops I ran over a kid at a crosswalk it was his fault not mine though I’m a good driver. Oh he died because I kept driving and dragged his lifeless corpse 30 feet? Bad luck, couldn’t have been avoided.

“Oh, that won’t happen to me” they say, while they fumble with their phone to reply “lol” to somebody who sent them a message. Only to look up just in time to see that cat in the road, then they swerve into an oncoming Jeep Wrangler, The people in the Wrangler, Thankfully, all have their seatbelt on, however this becomes a setback because the Wrangler bursts into flame for no reason. Additionally, you aren’t wearing your seatbelt- got in the way of your attempts to play Pokemon Go after all, so you are sent flying into a nearby ditch which is of course inexplicably filled with gasoline. As the flaming fuel from the Jeep Wrangler’s leaking gas tank edges towards the ditch you desperately fumble with your phone- a ditch full of gasoline will likely have a Grimer and you don’t have one yet, and once it catches on fire you’ll probably only see Slugma.